MY LIFE IS BRILLIANT

Behind This Smile

                                  As I look at you I smile

                                  but I want to cry.

                                 My heart is broken right now

                                 and I'm wondering when

                                 you'll ask me to talk to you,

                                 or pray with you,

                                 but you just smile

                                 and go on.

                                 It's okay, I understand.

                                 I do the same thing.

                                 I guess I'll just wait

                                 until tomorrow

                                 or the next day.

                                Maybe I'll be brave enough

                                 to ask you after a while.

                                Until then I guess I'll just live,

                                 and die

                                 behind this smile.

                                -Meredith Ward

Currently Watching Friends - The Complete Tenth Season see related

This one's for YOU sammy...

Chandler: Hey!... aaaaaahhhh!

Monica: What do you think?

Chandler: I think.... I think I can see your scalp.

Monica: Don't you just love it?

Ross: Ye... Yeah... Yeah... You got shellfish in your head.

Charlie: It's so... something... You go girlfriend!

Ross: You've never said that in your life, have you?

Charlie: Not once.

Ross: I thought so.

Monica: And listen to this... (shakes her body so the shells tingle)

Chandler: What d'ya know... It's a treat for the eyes and the ears.

Currently Listening You're Beautiful By James Blunt see related

  alrighty...well, ive gotten complaints that i havnt updated..(to the complainer: you'd better comment this time!! *wink*) my week is going very well.. i can not tell you what a joy these past couple of weeks have been. i was trying to explain it to my cousin earlier..i had just hit a ROCK BOTTOM and was so weepy all of the time and then "the weekend" happened. and i got to see a certain special someone and all of the sudden, this weight lifted off of my shoulders and i havnt been able to stop smiling since! of course this "someone" makes me so so so happy but really, i had a total transformation. all of the things i was burdened with, God has just released me from and ive been so elated lately. and so much more in tune with God. it's funny how it takes one thing to happen to just open your eyes to every thing else in your life, and the way you think about things. i feel like im on top of the world! and all my worries have melted away..i havnt analyzed anything(like i ALWAYS do) and i have been able to really just enjoy things for what they are and not think about what they could be. i can finally LIVE IN THE MOMENT..ive never really been able to do that before. so thank you sweetheart for being the catalyst that i needed to move on and to help me see things clearly. i almost feel like a whole new person!!

  something else wonderful has happened recently that i am thrilled about! but i cant really write it all out. its pretty personal but it is a blessing from God and just another reason for me to be completely in love with Him and my life right now!

  more good news...ITS A BABY BOY!! i got a call from lesley on monday, she had her checkup and its a boy! YAY!! i am soooo thrilled! the only thing im bummed about is her being all the way in kentucky but God knows what He's doing...everything will work out and i have a strong feeling that she'll end up back down here. she has to! ive got to see my little nephew! ok, so he's not my nephew..he's my cousin's son..but les is practically my sister so im going to be aunt manda!! YIPPEE!! i still cant believe she's having the first grandbaby...she's almost 2yrs younger than i am! what is THAT about?! lol...im so happy for her though! im happy for this family..that is going to be the sweetest little boy and im going to get to have a hand in raising him...I LOVE THAT. and i LOOOOOOVE babies/children...oh how i love them!

  i had a thought today...scary i know. but im thinking that im going to start researching communications positions in hospitals. i really dont think the world of marketing/advertising is where God wants me. i just need to find out where! ive always loooved the medical world and i want to help people. i want to be apart of something GREAT..something bigger than i am. i want to make a difference. maybe i can work with kids in hospitals somehow? who knows..but that is where my mind is headed right now. i pray everyone is spectacular! have a WONDERFUL week! and guess what NICK... im headed your way!! see you saturday! (btw...my mom wants to eat dinner a little early.. like 5 or 5:30ish..will that be ok? let me know =o) cant wait to see your handsome face!)